What if...

Perhaps it is the dull routine of study week. My mind seemed to wander more aimlessly than ever.

Was pondering over Life… My life in exact.

When I made a casual remark to Vinz over Msn that Ashley is born in Mezza9, Grand Hyatt, it didn’t hit me till now- that how significantly precise this statement is.

Hello. My name is Qiaohui.

And I have magically transformed into an Ashley, when my working life began at Mezza9.

Hey there, beautiful. I’m Ashley.

I gave myself this name cos I just like the ring of it and people can get the hand of it pretty fast. But never would I have predicted that a totally different life will just build up and change- with the birth of a name.

Should you meet Qiaohui on the streets 8 years ago; you will be greeted by a mild-mannered, shy and quiet girl- who looked too old for her age.

Now?

My friends couldn’t get me to shut up and I hate the fact that I look too young for my age. Loads of career disadvantages. Haiz…

Being in a service industry changed me dramatically, and slowly, I lost grasp of that girl that I once knew. Ashley is overshadowing Qiaohui each and every day. Not just because 2/3 of the people in her life are only acquainted with Ashley but the new perspectives of life, the acquired knowledge and stubborn determination have already replaced her past.

Well, Qiaohui used to have huge bunch of loving girlfriends. She used to think love is holy and Sex is sacred. Men are supposed to provide for families. The World was small and boring but kind. Singapore was all she ever wants to be in, for her entire life.

As Ashley progressed in her career and life, making life-changing choices with all the little courage she possessed, the safe World that Qiaohui has constructed was slowly trodden, eventually gave way to the new complicated and wild Ashley World.

Her friends are more of the masculine side. Love and sex do not need to come together, neither in ranking of importance. Women should be self-sustained and the World can be cruel yet at the same time, dangerously stimulating and exciting. And she recently diagnosed herself with commitment phobia.

I often wondered what Qiaohui will be doing now, if she did not step into Mezza9. Perhaps she will be saner and less perverse than Ashley. Maybe she is a mum to three. Maybe she already made splashes of success and wowed millions.

What if…

Is there really a bad or good choice that we make for our Life? How will a choice be classified as the Bad One? When it led you to an uncomfortable situation or when you don’t seem to gain anything out of it?

When I traced back the choices I made so far, I realized that I could hardly determine whether they were Bad or Good. A choice made, led to a consequence. Be it an ideal or a devastating one, you learnt from it. And you enhanced or improvised the consequence. Then... it leads to more choices to be made, more paths to be undertaken. We are in a cycle where it never stops.

This is quite assuring isn’t it? To know that no matter what choices we made, regardless of the consequences, we do gain from it. Cos the doors are never closed. And the road never ends. You can either persist to find a way out or let yourself drown in the sea of self-pity.

I find it mighty interesting to see how life unravel before your eyes, with every choice you make. The tangy twist of fate will just take it from here… and roll out the most spectacular movie of your life.

Outraged

This is my first time writing an email to the School Dean- but not in praise of the School but in contempt of the Administrative officer .

I am so F***ing pissed.

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Dear Dr XXX,

I will like to seek your urgent attention and help on this matter.

I am Ashley Ko (Sxxxxxxx), student of degree program 1290HSL, majoring in Tourism Management.

Before the commencement of my first year semester 2006, I wrote an email to appeal for exemption of subject ‘Introduction to Tourism Management- 1202HSL’, based on the completion of Diploma in Tourism Management from Temasek Polytechnic in Singapore.

It was rejected. I have no choice but to take on the subject.

During the recent enrollment for Semester 1, 2007, it was brought up to my attention that my polymates who have the same Diploma qualification, were exempted from this subject, right from the beginning- without going through any appeals.

We graduated in a same cohort and academic year and the most ironical part was- they have enrolled themselves in the University as students majoring in Hospitality Management- where I, in Tourism Management major, was not granted exemption from ‘Introduction to Tourism Management- 1202HSL’.

I seek your understanding of my reaction to this matter. Disappointed, unjustified and angry. With an exemption of this fundamental subject, I can enroll myself in a subject that can further enhance my learning processes in Tourism Management. Instead, precious time and money have been thrown into a subject that I need not to take at all, in the first place.

Yesterday, I wrote to the Credit Transfer department for an investigation and fair compensation. To my greatest dismay, they decided to cover their mishandling of this case by giving me the exemption of the subject NOW with a refund. They told me I need not sit for the exam and I will not be graded for this subject anymore.

This is not a FAIR compensation. They cannot simply just dismiss the time and efforts I have put on this subject. So far, I have scored a Distinction for the coursework- this should underlie how much work I have put into this subject.

This is downright insensitive and uncaring rectification they have taken to make ‘things right again’, and it was done without consulting me. They could have rectify the problem by honoring the fact I am already completing the subject and :
1) Give an exemption of 10 credit units for an elective subject.
OR
2) Give a refund without taking away the 10 credit units I have deserved.

Yet they have taken an action that undermines a student’s time, efforts and dignity.

Below, is all the email communication I have with the officer. I urgently seek your help in this matter. I am contactable at xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

With regards,
Ashley Ko