She peered intently at the strange crystal ball that was perched in an elaborated ebony frame.
Glimpse of a blurry image became to surface from within. Her eyes widened in recognition as the moving image grew in clarity.
There he was, shielding her from the strong gust of wind and rain with his big frame.
It was the day when they just got to know each other through mutual friends which they hit off right away. The hilarious misadventures of hers have reached his ears and triggered the special interest to meet the unwilling Star herself. Five minutes into their initial conversation and he was off, teasing her mercilessly, which she fought back with playful sarcasm. She was ever so thrilled to find a worthy debate opponent who can bring endless of stimulating tugs of verbal war.
That puddle of water was growing swiftly in size and depth as the rain poured as if the World coming to an end. He turned to find her standing before the puddle, , contemplating if she should jump over and risk landing in the middle of the muddy water. He stretched his hand out, urging her to leap over. He will be catching her, for sure. She hesitated. After all, they just knew each other and it will be kind of awkward holding his hand…. Before she can even come to a conclusion, he has already stepped into the puddle, lifted her up like a feather and in that swift yet long moment, she was at the other side of the puddle, bewildered.
“Is this the one?” a scratchy, deep voice broke her trains of thoughts. She shook her head slowly. This piece of beautiful memory has made her feel wildly alive yet protected.
“We shall see….” A pair of shrivelled hands caressed the smooth surface of the crystal ball. An image soon came to life like a flickering old TV.
They took the long MRT ride from the West into the East- Changi Airport for a little rail adventure, an excursion and an attempt to cheer her up. They were talking about everything under the sun except for that ugly Break-up. She shared her naughty escapades and shocking stories from her work where he fulfilled her curiosity with his worldly knowledge and experiences. It seemed only rightful that he was there with her; where he had steadfastly become her confidant whom she sought solace and comfort in.
As he walked quietly beside her, she stole a glance at him. He was not a looker but there was something about him, perhaps his confidence that made him almost incredibly charming. He held that charismatic quality like a delicious perfume that lure people to him. She wondered if he ever likes her more than a friend. Dismissing the thought quickly, she decided she had enough of heartbreaks and should be contented to keep this friendship as it is.
“Well…?” She looked up at the petite old lady with a slightly crooked nose and shook her head slowly. The old lady heaved a deep sigh and continued to move her hands slowly around the crystal ball.
There was an elegant display of teapot sets in the window. She leaned forward and took a closer look at a delicate-looking teapot with the most exquisite cravings on its smooth charcoal body.
Pulling him by her side and pointed at the teapot, “There. This will be the one that I will drink my tea from… when I am old and have all the time in the world to appreciate my aromatic Chinese tea.”
“Yes. I can imagine that. I wonder if there’s someone willing to share the pot of tea with me…” and he turned to her with a strange twinkle in his eyes. She was taken back at that implying question, and looked away.
“Well.. I.. I am sure that you will find someone to do that with you. Very soon.”
They continued to stare at the teapots in silence. He was oblivious of how fast her heart was beating and what kind of chaotic state he has just thrown her mind into. Words came up to her mouth, but none spilled out. And just like that, they strolled into a café for a dinner, resuming their status as a pair of good friends.
He was always so subtle in telling her how he felt about her. Sometimes, she wished that he would come across blatantly and bold about his feelings. But he never did. And things have patched up with her then boyfriend, which left her feeling awfully guilty for thinking about another man in any way.
Her eyes began to sting as she watched the fading image of the night when they have parted for home and knowingly, for two separate ways. The old lady fixed her eyes on her client who was looking all defeated and shaky now. Crossing her arms, she held her silence in anticipation of a closed deal.
He was the one. He has always been the one. He waited for her patiently all those times, sat beside her in unspoken understanding when she had one of those quarrels with her boyfriend. And never had he failed to make her laugh. Because of his silent love and the misfortunate choice that she has picked to pledge her love to, they lost that slip of chance to be together. And here she was now; recovering that slip of chance with a price to pay and a bit of magic. She could finally make it happen and not living in regrets, like in the past seven years. Yet, there was something remaining that she needed to see.
“I want to see him. Now.”
The old lady rolled her hideous yellow eyes and began to curse in a strange language, as she smoothed her hands over the crystal ball again.
There he was, again. Smiling like a true champion as he held his son up high in the sky. His lovely pregnant wife was sitting on the perfect green grass, holding out a cup of tea for him. He sat down beside her and gave a peck on her rosy cheek. Their little angelic son was staggering straight towards the flock of pigeons that sent the birds to panic and in every direction. The couple laughed as their son squealed with delight, throwing his little arms high up, in the air.
She caught her own reflection on the crystal ball, wrecked and sorrowful. She could no longer bear to look at those images and began to sob into her hands uncontrollably. He is perfectly happy now, with or without her. And she is the only one that has yet to move on, harping on a past that she could never have, thinking how wonderful things will be if she has held onto him tightly. She wanted a chance to be able to kiss his lips and his kind eyes and whispers into his ears that that he could not be any more perfect for her.
If there is a chance to undo one of the things that you have done in the past, what will that be?
There have been no regrets in life but him. Now, here is the opportunity to undo that bad choice she made. She cleared her throat to speak, but was choked by the flood of tears that came like a crashing wave.
Just like that, an intense feeling of relief and enlightenment washed over her.
The old lady frowned as she did not like the look of it. She hastily pointed to the crystal ball which conjured an image of her in his strong arms, cuddling tightly and stroking his hairs lovingly.
“This could be your future…” she croaked hopelessly.
“Stop. Please stop it now. I know what I want for my future. It is within my love to bless him with the good life he leads now.” She pushed a wad of bills to the old lady. With that, she walked out of the room knowing that she has finally left her regret behind.
--------------------------------E.N.D---------------------------
Editorial note:
How often we let ourselves wallow in regrets of ‘if I have done this….’ Or ‘if I have not said this...’?
I learnt in a hard way that I should be moving from where I am, not back from where I was. Regret is only a result of trying to make “ourselves" happy. When you become self-consumed, you get all bitter and harsh, without realizing that life aint gonna wait for you.
And just like John Barrymore said: ‘A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.’